The young, The old and Biblical Womanhood

My goodness...God has been a workin! In saying that I need to clarify that God is always working but here lately He has just shown His wonderful grace in allowing me to see His glory on a daily basis. Not from anything I have done or am but because of God working in me, I have had the opportunity almost every day for the past 2 1/5 weeks to share my faith on some level with someone. Watching God orchestrate divine appointments has allowed me to surrender my pride in realizing nothing I do allows these things to happen. One example is from last Tuesday at the gym. I go to the gym 5 days a week at 2pm without fail with one of the staff of CO. well, last Tuesday, something came up and we both needed to go at 1. Besides changing the time, I really just wasn't feeling like working out that day but because Christy was going, it held me accountable to go as well. I always do 10 minutes of cardio, usually running on the treadmill, before lifting weights. After I was finished, I used the elliptical behind me to stretch my calve muscles. well there was this girl on the machine that had the same shirt as a few other young people, signifying they were all there for the same reason. I overheard her talking to one of the trainers about how they were there with an organization that helps troubled teens and got really curious. I started asking her questions and she without hesitation just spilled her life story and what this organization was doing for her. About 5 minutes into our conversation this man came over and yelled at me for talking to and "distracting" his "workers." I won't lie, he scared me pretty badly. So I apologized and walked away to continue my work out...But I couldn't focus. I was really torn with feeling like I needed to go back over there and talk to the girls but I was afraid of the man. I very clearly could feel God tugging on my heart telling me He would protect me. With a sudden peace, I got up and walked back over to the girls who were now riding bikes. I sat down to a girl I hadn't talked to and just started asking some surface level questions. I honestly felt ill equipped for such a conversation and just asked that God would let it flow. Almost as soon as I prayed that the girl just started drilling me with questions about if I was in college and where and why I was down here and what kind of books I liked to read. Every single question was almost designed for me to share about why I was here and what God was doing. We were able to talk for a good 20 minutes about her beliefs and where she comes from spiritually. She was very curious and very excited to talk about it. I then found out they are in the gym around 1 almost every day. As we left and I told christy about what happened, her face just lit up. She explained to me how before I started talking to the girls she was burdened to talk to them but felt God telling her to pray for them instead. She said she felt so much war as the man came over and yelled at me and then began discussing self-help ideas with the kids and how her flesh just wanted to go preach to him but God was telling her to pray. she said it was so neat from her perspective to see God open the doors for me to talk to the girls as she stood back and prayed. What a beautiful picture of evangelism and fellowship through the Body of Christ! One thing we talked about last week was how Jesus never sent anyone out by themselves to further the mission, it was always with other believers. Seeing how things worked last week I really understand why that is how it is.

At work I've just been blessed with opportunity to discuss what I'm learning with my coworkers or even women that walk in the store. My job duties require me to converse with the women that come in the store and how perfect an environment for me to be able to funnel the conversation to God. It's been awesome.

Last week was the relationship seminar and we talked about everything from relationships in the body of Christ to dating and marriage, to Biblical womanhood and Godly contentment. My next blog is going to discuss those things and hopefully I will get a chance to post it in the next couple of days. In the mean time, I ask that you pray for me as I continue to learn and for my dgroup as they are growing in the Lord. Pray for my friend Christy as she is raising support for her job (because EVERYONE on CO staff raises support for their salary, even families with kids and stay at home moms! How cool is that?) Just pray that God will provide and if you know of anyone that would be interested in supporting her in any way, please let me know. Also pray that we can take all that we learn and build a firm foundation this summer to take back to our campuses and our families upon returning. Its encouraging to see 140 college students, male and female, pursuing a strong relationship with God. The way we treat each other and protect each other is like nothing I've ever seen before and I just know it is our hearts for that to continue as we leave this environment into one that doesn't not easily cater to such an uplifting atmosphere. Thank you for your support and your prayers.

Christianity

I want to start out with a few selections from the book we are reading this summer by one of my all-time favorite pastors David Platt. It's called Radical and it's basically in pursuit of taking back the Christian faith from the American Dream. It explores the ways in which our American culture creates idealogies within us that are enemy to God. Some things are really hard to accept because they are so foreign to the way I think, but the more I study scripture, the less my lifestyle seems to line up. This book has been helpful in pointing out the areas in my life that disprove my love for God.

"The first [question] was simple. Was I going to believe Jesus? Was I going to embrace Jesus even though he said radical things that drove crowds away? The second question was more challenging. Was I going to obey Jesus? My biggest fear, even now, is that I will hear Jesus' words and walk away, content, to settle for less than radical obedience to Him."

"If Jesus is who he said he is, and if his promises are as rewarding as the Bible claims they are, then we may discover that satisfaction in our lives and success in the church are not found in what our culture deems most important but in radical abandonment to Jesus."

"Ultimately, Jesus was calling them [the disciples] to abandon themselves. They were leaving certainty for uncertainty, safety for danger, self-preservation for self-denunciation. In a world that prizes promoting oneself, they were following a teacher who told them to crucify themselves. And history tells us the result. Almost all of them would lose their lives because they responded to his invitation."

"We are afraid that if we stop and really look at the God in his word, we might discover that he evokes greater awe and demands deeper worship than we are ready to give him"

"...we are starting to redefine Christianity. We are giving in to the dangerous temptation to take the Jesus of the Bible and twist him into a version of Jesus we are more comfortable with. A nice, middle class, American Jesus. A Jesus who doesn't mind materialism and who would never call us to give away everything we have. A Jesus who would not expect us to forsake our closest relationships so that he receives all our affection. A Jesus who is fine with nominal devotion that does not infringe on our comforts, because, after all, he loves us just the way we are. A Jesus who wants us to be balanced, who wants us to avoid dangerous extremes, and who, for that matter, wants us to avoid danger altogether. A Jesus who brings us comfort and prosperity as we live out our Christian spin on the American dream. But do you and I realize what we are doing at this point? We are molding Jesus into our image. He is beginning to look a lot like us because, after all, that is whom we are most comfortable with. And the danger now is that when we gather in our church buildings to sing and lift up our hands in worship, we may not actually be worshiping the Jesus of the Bible. Instead we may be worshiping ourselves."

That last one especially kicks my butt. In examining my motives and the depth in which I follow Christ, I have to wonder how much of this is true for me. The more I dive into the Word the more I feel that the Jesus I serve looks less like the Jesus from the Bible and more like me. Am I a devoutly seeking the God of the Bible or too afraid to because of what He may call me to give up? I think about all the justification that takes place in my heart every time I feel God calling me to surrender an idol in my life. Jesus + ____ = satisfaction? I long for the day that I don't fill in that blank. We learned today in our rally that we are innately rebellious from birth because of the fall of man. Thus, it is my curse to fill in the blank. I long to look more like God. I fear that means changing almost everything about myself. But I really feel the Holy Spirit tugging at my heart strings to pursue something more radical than what I know. To give up the idealogies the world would have me believe and follow and seek out God's will for my life. The biggest of these so far have been marriage and money. Oddly enough between the two of these, marriage was the easy one. God truly changed my heart and made it my desire to pursue a life of singleness. The money thing I'm still struggling to be faithful. He really wants me to trust Him in that area. and I really want to.

I'm trying to let this journey begin!!

alrighty....this is legitimately the first opportunity granted to me thus far to even consider blogging..aka it has been CRAZY busy.

So just to give a little play by play of the last six days:

Friday: Operation leave for SBP

• expectation: leave at 7am to avoid atlanta traffic+memorial day traffic
• reality: leave at 7:45am, go to starbucks (to start the day off right), not too much traffic
• expectation: arrive at Fort Walton Beach, Florida at approximately 1pm Central time
• reality: get lost and go two hours out of the way to arrive at 3:15pm Central time

lesson: don't have expectations

So we finally arrive at the lovel sandman hotel on Santa Rosa blvd! It's no hilton, but I am happy to call it home for the next two months. After our arrival we had till 5 to just chill and meet the other D-group leaders and they were all awesome! After that we were thrown into 5 wonderfully intense sessions discussing being a leader. The coolest part of all that was being reminded that being a leader in Gods kingdom means being a servant to those you are leading. But how applicable is that to all aspects of life? Serving everyone you interact with to the best of your ability is probably one of the strongest expressions of love...because servanthood takes sacrifice. Sacrifice of time, money, emotions, sleep, materials...and when someone sees your willingness to sacrifice your stuff for them, how much more loved could they feel? The heart of this servanthood and loving others boils down to the gospel of Jesus. We are learning so much about the simplicity of being a disciple of Christ and I love it. Ministering to others is about loving them and not judging them. Learning that actions are driven by the heart, you conclude that when someone's behavior is questionable, the problem lies within the heart. Thus, preaching the gospel of Jesus into their lives will reveal change in actions over time as they change within their hearts. These two ideas are what I'm going to try to adopt this summer and ultimately for the rest of my life.

So Friday-Sunday revolved around these sessions learning about servant leadership and it was awesome. Sunday we had a pool party at the Sites' house and kinda chilled for a bit. Monday was a huge work day as we worked non stop from about 8am till 2am. talk about tired. Then FINALLY everyone arrived Tuesday. I met my girls and we all bonded so well. Some great times driving down the road getting lost and just being CRAZY together, we couldn't help but see how evident it was that God ordained and orchestrated the 5 of us to share this 9 week journey together in The Word, accountability, worship and prayer.

So Last night kind of started our first real orientation session. Dilbeck talked about being fulfilled and finding satisfaction solely in God. His discussion revolved around the constant battle between our kingdom and God's kingdom. The most I took away from that was this equation he talked about that is at the heart of our kingdom:

Jesus + __________ = satisfaction

But in God's kingdom the equation looks like this:

Jesus=Satisfaction

The second equation is so much more appealing but my flesh is weak and today Satan knew how much I was trying to discover about what I try and fill in the blank. All of those things continuously attacked me today. If only I had this and Jesus I would be happy. If only this relationship were restored and I am growing in Jesus I will be fulfilled. O how much I want to surrender this mentality. GOOOOOD stuff.

Then last night we had some D-Group time, our first d-group meeting of SBP. We weren't really supposed to do testimonies till Sunday but the spirit was moving and we all ended up sharing our entire life stories and bonded so much. The girls in my group love eachother so much and last night overwhelmed me with Joy from the LORD as the evidence of His orchestration for us to be together was undeniable.

As you can see God is doing so much already. We are only on day 3 of 70. I have high expectations and I know the LORD exceeds even my highest expectation so I can't WAIT to see what He does.

We are all looking for jobs so continue to pray and thank you for your support!