The Judge

Lately, It's been a struggle for me to confess my sins to God. I keep thinking that things are going so well with us, that I would hate for something like sin come in the way. I have this picture in my mind of me looking up to heaven confessing my sin and this huge God looking down on me, disappointment on His face. "I've done alot in you, ya know" He'd say. And all my actions say to Him in return is that He just can't do enough. I'm just too sinful. He isn't powerful enough. Why would He want to redeem someone like me? I make the same mistakes over and again. I'm too much trouble...and the lies in my head keep feeding and feeding.

But this morning, He showed me that the picture I had in my head of how He deals with my sin, is far from truth.
Isaiah 43:24b-26 "But you have burdened me with your sins, you have wearied me with your iniquities. I, even I, am He who blots out your transgressions for my own sake; and I will not remember your sins. Put me in remembrance, let us contend together; state your case, that you may be acquitted."
-->So the truth is, if I hold onto my sin, I burden Him and make Him weary. When He blots out my sin, He does it for His glory and He does it forever--not remembering. He wants us working together, to talk through my sin so that He can have me acquitted, and I can be free of it forever. The reason for confession is not so He can then look down on me and be disappointed, He is disappointed when I sin and the moment I confess it is the moment He forgives.

It's funny how these things seem so elementary. Don't you learn this stuff in sunday school in like 3rd grade? Head knowledge is different from heart knowledge. a 9 inch gap that makes all the difference.

One.

Decision.December 1st. The deadline. The day for folks to decide whether they are going to China, SBP, Common Ground, School, Staying at Home, Taking on internships. The prayer and begging for wisdom and discernment during this time has been exponential. I think today marks a new journey for me and almost all of my close friends. I'm excited to see what it holds.

Gospel.We have our last CO meeting of the semester tonight too. Wrapping up our serious on American Idols: tonight features the American Dream, Money and Success. Guarding tonight in prayer, praying for numbers and readied hearts as the gospel is preached.

Spirit. I feel the Lord moving. Across our campus into new hearts. In our own hearts. Teaching us new things, Challenging us beyond what we could have ever imagined. My prayer is that we recognize what He gives. Knowing that all things come from Him. Giving thanks. But also that we approach everything in prayer. This truth needing to be preached most into my heart. I pray we do nothing apart from God and His presence. For what is any sort of progress without Him?

Peace.It's strange how peaceful I feel in the midst of such a crazy week. I think the Lord just wants me to know how much He is in control. If I just continue following the path that He is calling me to, everything will work out.

Trust. Trusting in His plan. Trusting Him to be in control.

Surrender. Surrendering my will. Surrendering my control.

Truth. Psalm 29:

Ascribe to the LORD, O heavenly beings,

ascribe to the LORD glory and strength.
Ascribe to the LORD the glory due his name;
worship the LORD in the splendor of holiness.

The voice of the LORD is over the waters;
the God of glory thunders,
the LORD, over many waters.
The voice of the LORD is powerful;
the voice of the LORD is full of majesty.

The voice of the LORD breaks the cedars;
the LORD breaks the cedars of Lebanon.
He makes Lebanon to skip like a calf,
and Sirion like a young wild ox.

The voice of the LORD flashes forth flames of fire. The The voice of the LORD shakes the wilderness;

the LORD shakes the wilderness of Kadesh.

The voice of the LORD makes the deer give birth
and strips the forests bare,
and in his temple all cry, "Glory!"

The LORD sits enthroned over the flood;
the LORD sits enthroned as king forever.
May the LORD give strength to his people!
May the LORD bless his people with peace!